[NOTE: This correspondence begins about three months after the epilog to Barrayar]
[handwritten note]
...Sorry to rush off without explanation, but last night Simon turned up a new high-level conspiracy to launch another retaliatory Komarr pogrom. I expect that I'll be spending weeks rushing between Top Secret face-to-face conferences with Commanders, Commodores and Counts, trying to convince them (once again!) that slaughtering prominent Komarrans doesn't serve Barrayar's long-term interests. Look at what's happening there now...
I've arranged for Gregor to have a "holiday" at Vorbarra Surleau while I'm away. He needs one, what with the tutors drilling him all day and Miles running him ragged in the evenings! Try to keep up an appearance of normality at the Palace while I'm gone -- if you can with Miles racing around (no, I will not reopen the Imperial Stables).
You mentioned that notion of a party for librarians that I once suggested, I
think shortly before Kou and Drou's wedding? I'm afraid I was speaking in
jest -- librarians are such a dour, secretive lot. By all means, try to
arrange one. If you can, it will shake up the class-conscious
society mavins ...
Aral.
Dear Cordelia:
...Ivan is progressing nicely in reading and arithmetic, but I cannot seem to get him interested in Tacti-Go, Strategic Links, or other games that require reasoning skills. It's only seven years until he enters Deutheboiz Prep, and his mind has to be sword-sharp if he is going to graduate at the head of his class and get on the fast track at the Imperial Academy.
Therefore, I wish to beg a favor. When Ivan and I next call on you, could
you arrange for one of Gregor's tutors to entertain Ivan with a few
lessons? I believe there are several tutors at the Palace at loose ends
while Gregor is away. I'd be ever so grateful.
Yours, Alys.
My Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Although this is an unusual request, I would be delighted to comply. I will
expect Master Ivan at 11:00 hours tomorrow.
Most Cordially Yours,
Steffan Bedakovich, Tutor.
Lady Cordelia Vorkosigan / Takes great pleasure in inviting / [name] / to attend a / Festive Reception / Honoring the Librarians of Barrayar / in / The Red Room of the Imperial Residence / on / Almsday, the Eighteenth of Pyátmonth / 18:00 hours / R.S.V.P. Imperial Residence Vorbarra Sultana
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
It is with deep regret that I beg to inform you that your proposed reception honoring members of a certain profession is simply out of the question.
Petrockzo, Chamberlain of Imperial Protocol.
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Because it is simply not done. Petrockzo.
My Dear Lady Cordelia:
As you wish, milady. That was different. The Groom was serving on the Regent's Own Staff, and the Bride was, not to put too fine a point on it, looked upon with favor by our Emperor. Besides, Lady Vorpatril's taste in these matters is beyond reproach.
I pray you to please understand: a request addressed to members of the
profession to which you refer, suggesting an appearance at the Emperor's
residence (save for those already in his service) is simply not done. I
need scarcely add that in some quarters the open discussion of persons of
this profession is considered to be in exceedingly poor taste.
Petrockzo.
Cordelia:
This is dreadful! On the way home today, Ivan asked me, "Mommy, what's a 'cog native dish function?'" I was amused for about five minutes, but as soon as I was alone I realized that he had meant cognitive dysfunction! Did he overhear Mr. Bedakovich suggesting he is retarded? Asking him what the tutor actually said is no use; its all a jumble in his mind.
Please call me without delay. Forgive this note -- I tried to reach you, but
the staff says you're out.
Frantically, Alys.
My Dear Lady Vorpatril:
I most fervently beg your pardon for inadvertently causing you distress by my thoughtless remarks! Please let me set your mind at rest: when I bandied about the term "cognitive dysfunction" in Master Ivan's hearing yesterday, I was speaking of my own! I just couldn't keep the old bean on track when I was with Master Ivan. No doubt I'm having an off week or something.
Pray be assured that Master Ivan's mental development is quite normal for a
child of five and a half. Virtually every child at his age displays few
skills in logic and deductive reasoning, as these require hardware (so to
speak) that will reach full development somewhat later in the brain's
maturation process...
Most cordially yours,
Steffan Bedakovich, Tutor.
cc: Lady Vorkosigan
Lady Vorkosigan:
Thank you for your recent inquiry. I am not aware of any organization or journal for members of my profession. Those in my profession are reluctant to advertise the fact, lest they draw to themselves unwelcome attention.
Nor am I in a position to freely communicate with those of my profession who are sworn to the Counts' service. They distrust this office, despite its proximity to the Throne, owing to some incident dating back to the Cetaganda invasion.
On a more personal note, I am reluctant to accept an invitation to such a function as you describe, were it outside the Palace. There is no doubt that other participants would seek my contribution to a little ad hoc colloquium in which this allergy I have could prove, let us say, mortifying.
I understand that when you rescued Master Miles from the Palace five years
ago, you did not realize you were destroying most of Emperor Dorca's personal
collection of Galactic works in the process. You may assure Sgt. Bothari that
Masters Miles and Ivan were not continuing the job when he came and
took them away.
Sincerely,
Aleksandr Ascidophaelus, Imperial Library.
Dear Cordelia:
Old Petrockzo is rather acerbic, isn't he? It was an open secret that he had ties with the Ministry of Political Correctness, so everyone on the Imp. Res. staff used to be terrified of him.
Your note did jog a memory. Back when I was still training under Negri, I once was nabbing a breakfast roll in the kitchen and noticed old Uncle Peshkopi, who used to brag that he had personally served Dorca's meals, was quite drunk and muttering to himself about "feeding all those librarians, all that trouble back then." Then he suddenly shut up. It didn't mean a thing to me, so I haven't thought about it until I got your note this morning...
I expect we may be in Vorbarra Surleau for another fortnight. Gregor is enjoying the outdoors and this break from his Hassanderan tutors.
I do so miss Kou, as I expect you miss Aral, but when Duty Calls...
Yours, Drou.
Lady Vorkosigan:
Although I have sent out several feelers among trustworthy members of my profession, I have heard nothing encouraging regarding attendance at your planned reception.
I am lending Master Miles a copy of the Vorthalia epic that so
captured his attention the last time he was in the new library. This child's
version is not taller than he is.
Sincerely,
Aleksandr Ascidophaelus, Imperial Library.
!!! COPY PROTECTED !!!
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DOWNLOAD THIS SCREEN
URGENT AND PERSONAL
LADY CORDELIA VORKOSIGAN EYES ONLY
THIS MESSAGE WILL SELF-ERASE IN [15] SECONDS ... [14] SECONDS ... [13] SECONDS ...
BRIEFING MATERIALS PREPARED FOR LADY CORDELIA VORKOSIGAN AS PER DIRECTIVE I-282628NOYDB2627R BY DEPT. [blank], IMPSEC.
Extracts from The Ascendency and Evisceration of the Honorable and Illustrious Counts of Barrayar, being a Private History drawn up for His own Amusement, by Count Vald Draku Vorlakiel of Darkoi (unpublished MS).
[This appears to be the only existent document in our files referring to the Betrayal of the Counts' Librarians. Unfortunately the "ancient and secret chronicles" cited in the text -- and Count Vorlakiel himself -- were apparently consumed in a fire set by anti-Yuri partisans during the Revolt. In interpreting the text one must make allowances for Count Vorlakiel's peculiar prejudices. -- the Editor.]
...Certain it is that, as their influence spread like rosebuds opening to the Sun, the more farsighted of the Counts came to desire that such wisdom of the agricultural and mechanical Arts as yet survived, from before the Collapse of the Tunnel in the AEther and the attendant Times of Trouble, should accrue to their respective Districks. Certain it is that, to further this noble aim, these Counts had occasion to swear to their service as chance permitted those walking repositories of ancient wisdom known to the indiscreet as Librarians. [1] (It may be amusing to recount here the old legend that the founder of this order, one Leibowitzski or Leifkowitzski, having a prophetic dream of the coming Troubles, did bury diverse books in barrels; his legacy being preserved by desert hermits who -- for want of wherewithal to write with, and to confound the marauding fire-men intent on destroying all records of former times -- fell to memorizing long passages from the preserved texts). Certain it is that a Count, upon learning that a Librarian serving the neighboring Count advanced the economy of the latter's Districk, should desire the removal of the same, so that his own Districk not suffer diminishment by comparison. Certain it is that the neighboring Count, in the fulfillment of his sworn pledges and to preserve within his Districk such hard-won wisdom as had come into his hands, should seek to shield the repository of this wisdom from the disparagements of the first Count. Certain it is that these differences of opinion -- arising, I must stress, out of the most noble and decent of motives -- were on occasion manifested in the subornation by stealth, abduction, or assassination of diverse Librarians, and the concurrent loss of their irreplaceable wisdom.
In consequence thereof, there soon arose the wise and proper reticency among Counts in speaking of their liveried Librarians or of what wisdom they might chance to possess, whilst the Librarians themselves undertook to discreetly veil their true identities and whereabouts from all but their sworn liege, as is related at length in those ancient and secret chronicles to which I have alluded to elsewhere ... Having achieved a degree of anonymity, a Librarian might then engage to sharpen his skills in detecting the activities of his fellows (that he might better serve his liege), whilst evading such unwelcome attentions by his fellows as may be directed towards himself. It was at this time that the Hidden Profession adopted as its emblems the dagger and the black cloak ... As their skills in subterfuges and subornation in stealth did increase, perforce these practices in time engendered such disagreeable incidents as the Affair of Count Letho's Poisoned Hollow Tooth and the Silent Sack of Vorpanckzo Surleau, as I shall have reason to transcribe at their proper places within this History from the chronicles aforesaid...
...Dorca's next step in his vile program of eviscerating the Counts. Pleading -- as he had so oft before -- that natural and proper Barrayaran custom must bow to the degenerate dictates of Galactik egalitarianism, Dorca proclaimed that henceforth Librarians should cast aside the veil of reticence, and openly avail their services to all of Vor and Noble blood. He used the very name of the Cloaked Profession in this proclamation, which, it should be said, was executed with a wink and a nod to the Nobles and Vors commanding the Imperial forces who already employed Librarians in slavish imitation of the corrupt Galactik military establishments. This final degradation caused more than one Count to secretly resolve to follow the example of the brave Count Vorloupulous and raise new armies to march against Dorca at an opportune moment. But the arrival of the Cetagandan invasion threw all their plans into disarray.
Far from being humbled by the incursion of these offworld military adventurers, Dorca's hubris grew until it exceeded all bounds. Of a sudden the Emperor was sized by a monstrous desire to gather unto himself all "data" (as it is called) relating to interstellar affairs as had yet come to Barrayar, but not to his own hands, following the restoration of Galactik intercourse. He craftily dissembled his new appetite under the transparently false claim that his staff required the offworld "data" for the prosecution of the War against the Cetagandans. With his own hands he drew up a Proclamation calling upon all Librarians, wherever they might be, to surrender up to him such Galactik "data" as they possessed, pledging his Word as a Vor that they should not be harmed during the exercise of this commission. But his deeds betrayed his true motive. Those Librarians unwise enough to heed the summons to his secret headquarters were sequestered -- to "protect" them from the attentions of the Cetaganda military intelligence apparatus, it was said -- and were soon suborned to his personal service by means so foul that I cannot bring myself to name them [i.e., appeals to patriotism and professionalism, including the not inconsiderable inducement of continuing to work with their own collections -- the Editor]. It appears that these oath- breakers -- for so by rights they should be styled -- formed the core of the Emperor's new counter-intelligence apparatus, pledging their services to the Emperor "that no enemy would ever again by stealth invest our world," rather than keeping their rightful places as servants of their respective lieges...
...As evidence of the moral rot engendered by Dorca, consider the Proclamation issued by him not a twelvemonth past requiring diverse Librarians to avail their services to all the peoples of Barrayar, regardless of rank or station! Those yet uncorrupted members of the Cloaked Profession, utterly alienated by this affront, have spurned those reproductions of the amassed offworld "data" offered by Dorca as a pretended restitution for the original resources stolen from diverse Counts. They have redoubled their efforts to rectify Dorca's ghastly injustice by removing his source of advantage in the traditional manner of their kind [i.e., kidnapping and data erasure -- the Editor]. As further evidence, I might cite the fact that some Librarians, deprived of their proper employment and depraved by the aforesaid moral rot, have forgotten themselves so far as to proffer their services to the lower classes, and (what is far more reprehensible) to those degenerate Galactiks believed to be polluting our world with their clandestine presence, such as the Komarrans, the Betans, the Escobarans, or (it is whispered) even the Cetagandans. For the last alone should Dorca deserve our approbation as a Traitor to his class...
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
It is with deep regret that I beg to inform you that holding your proposed reception at Vorkosigan House in Vorbarra Sultana is simply out of the question.
Petrockzo.
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Because it is simply not done. Petrockzo.
My Dear Lady Cordelia:
As you wish, milady. I regret to inform you that your father-in-law, Count Piotr, is quite certain that social events requiring your presence will not take place in Vorkosigan House in the foreseeable future.
Petrockzo.
Lady Vorkosigan:
I have yet to learn of any responses to my feelers.
Sincerely,
Aleksandr Ascidophaelus, Imperial Library.
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
It is with deep regret that I beg to inform you that the inclusion of Komarran Newt Kiev in the menu for your proposed reception is simply out of the question.
Petrockzo.
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Because it is simply not done.
Petrockzo.
My Dear Lady Cordelia:
As you wish, milady. I need hardly remind you that relations with Komarr are somewhat strained at present. Please be advised that this conciliatory gesture on your part may well be misconstrued by certain parties on that planet. In particular, if even the most innocuous mention of things Komarran should appear in conjunction with the name "Vorkosigan" in the Barrayaran media today, the mention is certain to be distorted out of recognition by the separatist agitators of Komarr next month. The upshot would be a most regrettable political setback.
In view of your well known appreciation of aquicultural foods, may I venture to suggest that you substitute Nov'priept marsh trout for your original selection?
Petrockzo.
The Ministry of Public Information
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Thank you for your kind enquiry. We regret to inform you that our Ministry
cannot provide you with a listing of librarians.
Most Cordially Yours,
Menander Tetraklorides, Office of Public Contacts.
Ministry of Education
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Thank you for your kind enquiry. We regret to inform you...
Ministry of Data Access and Standardization
...We regret to inform you...
Ministry of Political Correctness
...regret to inform you...
Imperial Services Information Agency
...regret to inform you...
Vorbarra Surleau Bureau for Better Business
...regret to inform you...
Pan-Barrayar Information Distributors, Inc.
...regret to inform you...
Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
Thank you for your kind enquiry. We regret to inform you that it is against
Imperial Security policy to supply listings of librarians. An extensive
review of our records fails to account for this Department of [blank] you
refer to. Perhaps you are thinking of another Ministry.
Most Cordially Yours,
[blank], Public Contacts Officer,
IMPSEC, Dept. of [blank].
Data Net Services.
Customer: Vorkosigan, Cordelia 19841984.4.11.84
Topic: Librarians OR Information Managers
Results:
Dear Cordelia:
Ever since that dreadful misunderstanding with Mr. Bedakovich, I can see that Ivan is getting the best education that Barraryar can provide. Yet I keep thinking there are other standards besides Barrayar's. Yours, for example...
Alys.
My Dear Lady Vorkosigan:
I regret to inform you that at last report the Academy of Hassander did not yet possess sufficient information resources to require the full time services of librarians. I dare say your assumptions were based on my alma mater's fame as the academy of Imperial tutors. If you wish further information on the Academy, I recommend that you write to the Registrar, Mr. Pavel Kohlabe...
Steffan Bedakovich, Tutor.
Dear Cordelia:
Many thanks for the list of disks, which the Betan Consulate delivered this morning. When I asked you about better educational methods for Ivan, I didn't know what I was letting myself in for!
The notion that everyone on Beta Colony is entitled to a complete
education takes getting used to. Now I can appreciate how you must have felt
some years back, when you first learned that data net access isn't available
to all Barrayarans...
Alys.
My Dear Lady Cordelia:
Yours of the 33rd is to hand. Your interest in our educational methods is most gratifying; as you have requested, I shall be candid.
The Academy of Hassander turns out tutors suitable for the children of Vor, Noble, and especially, Imperial blood. I dare say our methods would appear quaint by galactic standards, judging by Escobaran educational journals I have seen. We tutor our tutors (so to speak) more or less one-off, with every expectation that our graduates will eventually instruct their charges in a similar manner...
...I must confess that some younger members of the faculty (myself among
them) have expressed the hope that we might one day train tutors to address
a larger audience, as it were, more in keeping with the practices of galactic
educators. We foresee that certain obstacles will have to be overcome before
this worthy hope is fulfilled. For one, our most influential faculty and
administrators are staunch Conservatives, and most honor the ancient dictum
that if the lower classes are taught much beyond the rudiments of reading,
spelling and simple arithmetic, total anarchy will follow. For another, our
own Count Piotr has been known to utter sentiments of a similar nature...
Most cordially yours,
Pavel Kohlabe, Registrar,
Academy of Hassander.
Dear Cordelia:
...I agree that the educational advantages are very lopsided. To my distress, my thoughts keep turning to what I saw of the underclasses when Padma and I were hiding from Vordarian's security forces. My dear, I was appalled by the ignorance of those people. The worst of it was, many knew they were missing out and would have no hope of gaining advantages we take for granted. We have tutors and preparatory schools; the professional and merchantile classes have the new schools and technical training; but the people of the caravanserai have nothing. In retrospect I realize there were signs everywhere of resentment of Vor advantages such as open access to the data nets. The Peoples Defense League is simply the most extreme manifestation of this resentment. And what of the hill folk in Piotr's district who sheltered Gregor and you from Vordarin's troops?
I'm afraid that the underclasses need a way to better themselves -- by their
own efforts, mind -- or twenty years from now when Ivan should be getting
married, he will be fighting in a civil war against the PDL instead. I can't
just go around urging everyone to bestow universal education on the masses
from a silver platter; I've read about the results of that approach on other
planets. Besides, I would alienate all my friends by appearing as a radical
come out of the closet. It is a delicate dilemma. We need to talk.
As always, Alys.
Cordelia:
Yes, yes, that is ideal. It sounds so high-minded -- but you may be sure I'll be keeping my hands on the reins and we'll actually get things done instead of talking about them till doomsday. Of course we must launch the effort with a social splash!
I do wish you had asked me before about finding guests. My dear, you can't
expect those sort of people to just appear on command. You have to lure them,
to offer them something interesting enough to make it worth their while.
Weren't you telling me that Betan educators are always flocking to symposiums?
Alys.
Cordelia:
I suppose this is another of your wild schemes to import Betan practices to our beleaguered planet and turn Society on its head. I won't have it, I tell you.
Piotr.
P.S. On the other hand, how are we going to catch up with the rest of the universe with half our population living in total ignorance of galactic technology, let alone not knowing what's happening two districts away? Oh, go ahead. Its not as if you're going to found a teacher's college or something. P.
My Dear Lady Cordelia:
I can find no reason to object to your planned reception as it is currently
structured. Indeed, I believe you have hit upon an admirable venue and
occasion, well away from those Imperial entanglements which members of a
certain profession might wish to avoid...
Petrockzo.
[handwritten note]
...A most elegant solution, Dear Captain! Lady Alys is known to be the confidant of the Emperor's foster-mother, and many will support any reasonable undertaking sponsored by her. Congratulations! You've found something Alys can worry about instead of that young idiot Ivan. We can't keep on arranging marriages in my Staff just to distract her...
My enemies will have little basis to claim I am furthering some
modernization program of my own. Everyone knows I am immune to the
banishments of my wife. Officially...
Aral.
The Academy of Hassander / Is Pleased to Announce / the Inaugural Lecture / Honoring the Establishment of / The Padma Xav Vorpatril Memorial Foundation / For the Advancement of Primary and Secondary Education / on / Almsday, the Eighteenth of Pyátmonth / Patroness: Lady Alys Vorpatril / Dr. Galini Barkhas, / Barrayaran Merchant Marine (Retd.) / Will Speak On / "Talking With Your Enemies and Living to Tell About It: / Clandestine Methods of Information Exchange / Between Rival Houses on Jackson's Whole / (A Privileged Observer's Evaluation)" / at the / Academy Auditorium / 15:30 hours / The Lecture will be followed by a / Festive Reception 2 / Hosted by / Captain Cordelia Naismith, / Betan Expeditionary Force (Retd.) / in the Refectory / 18:00 hours / R.S.V.P. Pavel Kohlabe, Registrar Academy of Hassander
The End
[1] Here I must employ a term that properly belongs shrouded in silence, yet which must be used if truth is to be served. That I can bring myself to write it at all bespeaks the extent to which the fiber of our formerly steadfast society has unraveled.
[2] 2 [Enciphered hidden text] Absolute anonymity is guaranteed on the Word of Vorkosigan.
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